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Authentic Pleasure: Reconnecting With Your Sexual Self

rating: modest or mainstream

Many people of all genders find themselves disconnected from their sexual selves, caught between life stresses and relationship pressures.  If your sex life no longer feels enticing or intimate, this workshop is for you.  Learn how to rediscover and honour your authentic sexual self, and bring pleasure and connection back to your love life!

 

This workshop is based on theories and techniques that combine mindfulness and meditation with a critical deconstruction of negative social influences on our pleasure.  Participants will learn about and discuss the pressures that we face to be successful in our love lives, and how that success is rarely defined by our own pleasure, connection, and enjoyment.  They will then be encouraged to privately brainstorm 1-3 beliefs/myths/biases that stand between themselves and pleasure.  Sharing is welcome, but not required.  Participants will create a short message to themselves that affirms and empowers their authentic sexual selves, and be led in a brief meditation based on those messages.

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Avoiding Top Burn-Out

rating: for kinky audiences, no explicit content

Often times those of us who are exploring our dominance find ourselves craving higher intensity while experiencing less and less satisfaction and connection with our partners.  This workshop is designed to help participants who are seeking encouragement and techniques for building more intense, pleasurable connections through a relaxed and low-protocol style of dominance.  Dr. Ruthie will offer a series of lively demonstrations and opportunities for audience participation that address issues of over-performance, top burnout, identity loss, gender expectations, disparate levels of S&M interest, warm-up & after care for tops, and more.  Bottoms will also benefit from learning how to encourage their tops to facilitate in ways that are more relaxing for the top yet more satisfying for both of you.

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Best Cock on the Block: Intro to Strapping It On

rating: mainstream or adventurous, kinky or not, can be adapted for explicit content

All body shapes, sizes, anatomies, and genders can enjoy slinging a silicone cock! Bring your own dildo with a flared base, and your harness (or we’ll help you make rope harness) and get ready to learn how to have the best cock on the block. Learn how to position your cock, work your hips, become strap-on orgasmic, and brush up on important considerations for fucking throats, asses, and cunts. Need practice? Just want people to cheer for you while you hump? Enjoy some of our luscious volunteers for some holes-on practice opportunities to help you develop your own perfect thrust.

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Dirty Talk for the Shy

rating: modest to mainstream, no explicit content

Learn the secrets to developing your own style of verbal seduction from the author of The Nice Girl’s Guide to Talking Dirty!  Don’t worry,  though, this workshop is for practicing verbal seduction with all genders.  By the end of this interactive class even the most shyparticipants will leave with the skills to start talking dirty and flirting their way into a memorable predicament at this year’s event.  Whether you’re sweet and shy or bold and daring, you’re sure to have fun learning these oral skills.

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Dirty Stories & DIY: Masturbation Party

rating: adventurous, includes audience nudity and masturbation

Be your own lover in this hands-on event dedicated to the delights of sharing in each other’s sexual energy while touching only yourself.  Dr. Ruthie will host this special party with the help of their favourite lube fairies, and hand mirrors for those who like to watch themselves work it. Listen to erotic stories read out loud by Dr. Ruthie, focus on the sounds of your fellow self-lovers, or bring your own music and earbuds.  Whether you’re a pro at fingering it out, or a novice to the joys of wanking, you’re sure to enjoy the erotic experience of this sexually charged environment. All participants are expected to stay rooted, this is not an event for those seeking to wander and watch. You are invited to bring pillows, blankets, towels, sex toys, or whatever other tools you like to use for self pleasuring. All genders and sexualities are warmly invited to join in the fun.

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Fantasies For The Shy

rating: modest or mainstream, no explicit content

Learn how to discover your inner sex god/dess and get playful in the bedroom!  This workshop will help you learn what excites you, how to invite your partner to explore, and offer you tips for bringing your fantasies to life.  You’ll leave with everything you need for a sexy new adventure!

 

This workshop discusses the nature of fantasies, what makes them fun, and then breaks fantasies down into their hottest components. Singles and couples/triads/etc. will all feel welcome.  Participants were invited to fill out their own fantasy-building worksheet while also contributing to a group fantasy with Dr. Ruthie.  You may choose to share your new fantasies or simply enjoy listening.  This workshop is designed specifically for participants who are new to workshops, a bit shy, or who are working on developing their fantasies.  It’s an ideal workshop to help folks warm in and feel welcome in a relaxed and caring atmosphere without skimping on erotic, exciting content.

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Fat Fuckers

rating: adventurous, kinky or not, clothed demonstrations of sexual activity

Soft, luscious, rolling, expansive, fat bodies are overflowing with unique opportunities to be bodies of sexual abundance, pleasure, and joy. Ready to tap into the full potential of larger bodies? Join Dr. Ruthie and Sarah Meng for an experiential celebration and exploration of many ways in which we can draw out the pleasures of our hearts, brains, and ample flesh. All bodies are wanted, welcome, and enough here. Participants are welcome to join us in gentle hands-on activities, or to watch and help hold affirming energy with us. This workshop will focus on queer sex, however straight and cis-gender allies are warmly welcomed to join. 

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Finding Pleasure After Trauma

rating: everyone, no explicit content

We each deserve pleasure, regardless of our pasts.  But how can we find our sensual and sexual selves after trauma?  Dr. Ruthie brings their extensive experience in helping others discover how to nurture the return of pleasure after pain.  Attendees will gain new insight and tools for rediscovering joy and intimacy. 

This workshop will focus on survivors of intimate partner violence, sexual assault, medical trauma, childhood sex abuse, and other traumas.  This workshop is grounded in trauma recovery theory focused on mindfulness, grounding, restoring, and reclaiming of the self and uses techniques common in strengths-based social work, positive psychology, and the narrative approach.  Participants will not be asked to disclose the source of their traumas during the workshop, and instead will be invited to quietly reflect, draw, or write as needed so as to keep the space as safe and comfortable as possible for everyone.  This workshop is best for participants who are no longer in a high-risk situation (ie: no longer dating their abuser), with the exception of those who face ongoing medical interventions. 

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First Base (plus) Party

rating: adventurous, kinky or not, may have explicit content

Meet new friends and make out with them! Join us for rousing games of Spin The Bottle merged Seven Minutes In Heaven, as well as creative twists on Truth Or Dare. If you thought these games sounded fun as a teenager, just wait until you see how Dr. Ruthie does it! Their unique facilitation and ground rules help to co-create a supportive, welcoming, and very steamy party without the trappings of social pressure and coercion that used to ruin the fun. We’ll cheer you on while you and your eagerly consenting dates explore hot questions, kiss, canoodle, get kinky, or whatever else your hearts (and bits) desire.

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Hands-On Anal Pleasure Workshops

rating: very adventurous, kinky or not, includes audience nudity, partnered anal/genital stimulation

Bring your butt and a lover or three and prepare to follow along as Dr. Ruthie guides you through anal touch, from external stimulation to deep manual penetration. You'll learn about the most sensitive areas for all anatomies, techniques for understanding what a butt wants, how to reduce pain (if you want to), and how to relax and enjoy better anal play. Don't have a partner? Arrive early to meet new friends. You may also bring your own toys for anal and genital stimulation, if you like. Only hands and toys will be used in this workshop.

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Hot & Kinky and Anxious & Depressed

rating: can be adapted for everyone, kinky or not, no explicit content

Anxiety, depression, and similar experiences can make it hard to make time, space, and motivation for positive experiences of sex and kink. If you or your loved ones relate to feeling anxious and/or depressed and find it hard to: connect in sexual ways, get around to having dates, feel motivated to engagement in intimacy, or you have mismatched levels of desire in either direction, then this workshop may be for you. Participants will learn and practice skills for staying grounded, enjoying dates, and exploring sex & kink while still being realistic about anxiety and depression. No diagnoses or medications are required to attend this workshop, and it cannot replace advice from your own physicians and mental health professionals.

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Lip Service: Guided Kissing Party

rating: everyone, no explicit content but includes public kissing

Grab your sweetie/s as you are guided through kissing games for all couples and groups where participation is strongly encouraged! Practice new ways to tease and please your partner through kissing. You’ll leave with new skills for slowing it down and heating it up in ways you can enjoy anywhere, anytime. Arrive with one or more partners, or come a few minutes early to find others looking to meet someone new.

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Lovingly Objectified: Advanced Dirty Talk Techniques

rating: adventurous, kinky, can be adapted for explicit content

Verbal objectification doesn’t need to be humiliating or degrading! Learn to use your sharp tongue and creative mind to make your partners feel simultaneously submissive and cherished. Watch live demos and follow-along in small groups as Dr. Ruthie guides you through plotting out how to treat your lovers to nurturing kindness that can be both difficult and intimate to receive. Attendees will leave having watched (or tried!) three different techniques, all rooted in an approach for loving verbal objectification that can be used in a myriad of ways.

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Navigating Consent for Newbies & Sluts

rating: can be adapted for everyone, no explicit content

Our understandings of the importance of sexual consent are evolving quickly, but what do consent conversations look like in real life? Do people actually ask for consent all of the time, or are some things still ok without it? How can we make consent conversations useful for anonymous hook-ups, intense D/s dynamics, folks with little sex or kink experience, introverts & shy lovers, and long term relationships? What are appropriate expectations to have of all parties around negotiating consent? Dr. Ruthie has been researching and teaching about consent and intimate abuse for over 15 years, and is here to answer all of these questions and more. Participants will leave with the tools to better gauge when to have consent conversations, skills for making them useful and engaging, and techniques for navigating consent in diverse contexts.

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Pet Park Play Party

rating: kinky, no explicit content

Come wag your tail and get your belly rubs at our interspecies pet park! Water bowls, treats, plus a selection of toys will be provided and you’re also welcomed to bring goodies to share. All well socialized pups, kitties, ponies, and other creatures (including handlers) are welcomed, while your gear is welcome it is not required in order to join in the fun. Dr. Ruthie will be on hand with treats and scritches, as well as to welcome all pets including any that are shy or without a handler.  Please plan appropriately for knees and paws/hooves/etc., as neither floor mats nor other equipment will be available in this space. This is a non-sexual event.

 

(note: This event is for humans who enjoy platonic frolicking while role-playing as well behaved animals. No actual animals are involved.) 

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Polyamory 101: Navigating the Joys and Jealousies of Opening Your Relationship

rating: everyone interested in the topic, no explicit content

What does it mean to open a relationship, and how do people navigate the hard parts in order to enjoy the pleasures of sharing our hearts and bodies with more than one? This workshop will help attendees understand some of the most common poly relationship structures and address many of the most frequent concerns and joys.  Poly 101 is designed for attendees of all genders and sexualities who are new non-monogamy, or who are seeking foundational support, information, and tools for opening up more successfully.

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Polyamory 201: Advanced Tools for Successful Polyam

rating: everyone interested in the topic, no explicit content

Ready to move beyond the basics of polyamory? Join Ruthie as we dive into both the joyful and gritty parts of living and loving as a non-monogamous person and focus on building successful polyamory relationships. We’ll cover various structures of consensual non-monogamy, from what they are to important tips for creating and maintaining these relationships. Managing power imbalances, solo polyamory, growing (and reducing) your polycule, navigating assumptions of monogamy, dealing with power imbalances, and more will be included. Participants will leave this workshop with new resources and ideas they can use right away to help build open relationships that can really work.

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Sexy, Successful, Solo Poly

rating: everyone into solo poly

Are you interested in connecting with delicious partners, but not so wild about having a primary? Or maybe you’re a couple looking to find a free range unicorn? This workshop will help solo poly folks to consider and advocate for their needs with others and themselves. Existing relationships will learn ideas for more successful, respectful dating with solo poly individuals. As with all workshops by Dr. Ruthie, all genders, sexualities, and relationship structures are welcome.

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Sexy Spanking for Foreplay

rating: mainstream or adventurous, kinky

Learn how to tease and arouse your lovers (and yourself) through spankings designed with pleasure in mind.  Watch Dr. Ruthie’s live, clothed demonstrations and see what a seductive spanking can be.  You’ll discover the secrets to a soft touch, a firm hand, and perfectly delicious pacing as well as techniques for turning spanking into an exciting twist on foreplay and sex.  Leave ready to practice your new skills right away so you can enjoy sexy spankings by themselves or as a kinky path to further intimacy.  This workshop is designed especially to those who are newer to spanking and kink!

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Sharp Tongues for Mean Tops

rating: very adventurous, very kinky, potentially triggering material|

Take your dirty talk to new lows with this class on verbal humiliation and objectification. This workshop will help you explore different tones and purposes for wielding your words with sadistic glee, from playful sparring to shaming degradation. You’ll learn how to tap into darker inspirations and fantasies, as well as how to improve your pacing and creativity when crafting scenes based in this style of play. Both tops and bottoms will learn tips for negotiating safe boundaries, checking in as you go, and aftercare. Attendees should come prepared to witness intense and offensive verbal content. However, while attendees may apply this content to any area they like, the presenter will not include examples with race or religious play nor humiliation based on sex- or gender-queerness in this workshop.

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Speak Up! No Holds Barred Q&A

rating: everyone, no explicit content

Throw a truly unique party that your guests will never forget by making Dr. Ruthie your very own sex educator for the night! Drop Dr. Ruthie a line to discuss how to tailor their visit to your event size, attendance, and theme. They can show up with gifts for attendees, a lovely anonymous question box, and they can even set up an anonymous survey in advance. No question on sex, sexuality, gender, dating, or relationships is too modest or taboo with Dr. Ruthie!  Speak Up nights are perfect for bachelor and bachelorette parties, birthdays, social nights, speed dating events, networking events, collarings, fundraisers, pride parties, divorce parties, health centres, and more.

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© 2020 by Ruth Neustifter, Ph.D.